Will you watch? Sunday night is football night in America, says Al. But also it marks the Silver Anniversary of MTV's Video Music Awards, and despite last year's masterful display of waning cultural relevance, there may be reasons still to tune in that don't relate strictly to masochism and/or self-hatred. Like, there's Kanye's show-closing performance of the new single "Love Lockdown." (You are entitled to think he's forgiven MTV for hating black people, although I suggest you think he understands the promotional opportunity this affords his new single, which just happens to be going on sale the next day.)

There will also be a Britney Spears opening segment! I was wrong yesterday, though: She will not be performing, just doing something "fun and unexpected." This diminishes the show's imminent train wreckability. I'm not sure if that makes it more or less watchable. Other stuff that'll make it more (or, less) watchable includes Kid Rock and Lil Wayne together at last, Katy Perry covering "Like A Virgin," and performances from Rihanna, T.I. (Feat. Rihanna), T-Pain, Lupe, Paramore, the Ting Tings, the Jonas Bros. You can be sure Russell Brand will be sexually inappropriate and pretty British as host, if that's your spot of tea. And if the awards themselves are more your thing, sorry: the bands you like already won what they're going to win. But in case you will/are forced to watch anyway, here's a scorecard so you can play along at home, followed by a drinking game suggestion to make the time go by, and a very special message from Lou Reed:

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Announcing that the dreamy, carefree “tune in, turn on, drop out” phenomenon was deceased and decomposing, “Kid Charlemagne” with its funky rhythm coiling underneath a bouncy clavinet made it official. Written for one notorious Mr. Owsley, the acid prince of Haight-Ashbury, the message is direct and brutal. “Now your patrons have all left you in the red/your low-rent friends are dead/life can be very strange/all those day-glow freaks who used to paint the face/they’ve joined the human race…” Fagen sings. The tune’s full chorale is impressive but words fail when I try to describe the guitar performance delivered by Larry Carlton here. If you’re a guitarist and you haven’t heard it you need to. Now. Not allowing you any chance to recover, “The Caves of Altamira” arrives and sweeps you right off your feet. After an ominous beginning a fat horn section blares as the rock-solid drums of Bernard Purdie and the awesome bass of Chuck Rainey pull you along like an unrelenting undertow. Written about a youngster who finds peace and solace among undiscovered cave drawings, it raises the specter of history repeating itself. “Before the fall when they wrote it on the wall/when there wasn’t even any Hollywood/they heard the call and they wrote it on the wall/for you and me, we understood,” he croons. But the ultra-dynamic accents punctuated by the sharp brass throughout and the great sax ride at the end are what slays me about this number.

“Don’t Take Me Alive” just may be the hardest rocking song Steely Dan ever created and it is an unspecified guitarist (take your pick from the credits) with his stunning tone and technique that steals the show. He kills without mercy. The verses ride atop a powerful wave of electric piano, guitar and vibraphone while the unforgettable chorus kicks like a mule. It’s about a standoff where the protagonist has reached the very end-threads of his mental rope. “Can you hear the evil crowd/the lies and the laughter/I hear my inside/the mechanized hum of another world/where no sun is shining…” Donald sneers. Despite its tragic tale that has no discernable silver lining it’s my favorite cut on an album that literally oozes with excellent tunes. “Sign in Stranger” follows and this simmering filet of funk tells of an exotic and dangerous locale where a criminal can go to establish a new identity. “Do you have a dark spot on your past?/ leave it to my man he’ll fix it fast/Pepe has a scar from ear to ear/he will make your mug shots disappear,” Fagen sings. Whoever is responsible for providing the torrid piano licks is nothing short of amazing and by now you should expect the guitarisms to slap you silly and they do. The inventive bridge pops up out of nowhere and the thick horns at the end are a complete surprise.

There’s nothing particularly tricky about “The Fez,” it just hitches a ride on its supremely funky groove and doesn’t stop till four minutes later. This ditty briefly describes a fellow’s odd sexual peccadillo that requires his wearing of a certain kind of hat and it’s a hard one to categorize. I suggest you just sit back and enjoy the entertaining collage of instruments that rise and fall throughout the expert Roger Nichols mix. Or get up and dance. Either one. The eclectic “Green Earrings” has a very prog arrangement to digest as it rumbles by your ears. Can’t say that I have an inkling of what lines like “cold, daring/no flies on me/sorry, angel/I must take what I see” signify but that’s okay. Some things are best left as mysteries. I must point out, however, the cool psychedelic guitar effect that makes it swirl like a boiling lava lamp during the fadeout.

“Haitian Divorce” is not only the only Steely Dan single to chart in the UK top twenty but it’s also one of their most endearing and clever songs. Here the traditional reggae beat fits perfectly as it tools along below the vibraphone and a gritty talk box guitar that give it a unique personality. Divorce was all the rage in the 70s and Don & Walt’s snickering story of a woman who flees to the Caribbean to dissolve her marriage, enjoys a passionate tryst with one of the hot-blooded locals and then has a “tearful reunion” with her spouse is spot on for the times. But it seems she brought back a souvenir. “Some babies grow in a peculiar way/it changed, it grew/and everybody knew/semi-mojo/who’s this kinky so- and-so?” Donald sings with a sly grin. Of particular interest are the nifty bass harmonics that ring out during the finale. Primo stuff.

Speaking of weird sexual situations, “Everything You Did” tops them all in that category. In this saga a wife’s jilted husband seems a lot more interested in hearing the juicy details of her indiscretion than in locating his rival and, in the process, discovers that she’s kinkier than he ever imagined. “I never knew you/you were a roller skater/you gonna show me later/turn up the Eagles, the neighbors are listening,” he implores. The number’s sneaky feel and by now obligatory terrific guitar ride make it a winner. The album’s title cut and closer is by far the darkest and most progressive tune included. This unorthodox track is mostly a repeating pattern of a verse, verse, and chorus structure, separated by instrumental sections populated by hair-raising jazz trumpet and cornet runs. The sarcastic but glorious chorale belies the stark glimpses of harsh reality offered in the lyrics. It tells of desperate immigrants who give up everything to chase the American Dream only to find they’re no better off than they were living in the squalor they left behind. “They are hounded down/to the bottom of a bad town/amid the ruins where they learn to fear/an angry race of fallen kings,” Fagen reports. It’s a haunting piece of aural art that will leave a permanent impression on your psyche.

In my review of “Katy Lied” I said it was a fine example of progressive songwriting and I feel that this album is even better in that respect. Add in the exemplary musicianship (especially the out-of-this- world guitar performances that pepper the music from start to finish), the fantastic engineering job, the majestic arrangements and the articulate wordplay that abounds and you have a bonafide masterpiece. There are those who will protest Steely Dan’s very presence on any prog rock list but I’m here to tell you that music production this wonderful, that makes such a progressive statement, needs no one’s validation. 5 stars.

by Chicapah


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The weekend has gone by way too fast. Sigh. I saw that movie "The Strangers" last night. Fucking scary. Scott Speedman is pretty dreamy too as you would expect. Hated the ending though. Also saw Cassette Electrik perform at their single launch for 28 Days too - they were amazing and their new video is something else too! Can't wait to see them perform at Electroqueer@Barcode next week now! But until then, here's what's brewing and more hot than hot...

One band on my hot tip is definitely The Gadsdens. I've seen live a few times now and really enjoy their stuff. They have uploaded a few new songs on their Myspace called "To Love You" and "I Killed Love" which are really fab. In fact, if you take a few moments to listen to all the songs on their MySpace player, you'll really get a feel for how their album is shaping up. It truly is one of THE albums I am most looking forward to. I can't wait to hear the final recorded version of "Tuscon" as well - it's hot.

Holy shit. EQ reader Rob G has pointed me in the direction of a new electro glam trio called Pandering & The Golddiggers who are mezzzzzmerizzzzing. Listen to "Disco Bloodbath" and you'll be like "holy shit" as well. It's that fab. And to quote Rob G, "Parisian Cafe is freaky!". I agree - more on Pandering & The Golddiggers to come...

Making sure that we don't forget about him, Darren Hayes continues to upload some gems and lost songs from "This Delicate Thing We Made" to his MySpace. This time we are treated to a pop diddy called "The Wrong Way" which you can download now. The next big project in world Darren Hayes is the release of his new concept movie "This Delicate Film We've Made" which will be released in December.

Temposhark's cover of "I Kissed A Girl" by Katy Perry is rather ace. They should perform it at their next show, with more synths and beats.

I can't stop listening to New Kids On The Block new album, "The Block". I think I listened to it four times yesterday and it's A LOT better than I was expecting. It's very electro-tinged which I wasn't quite expecting. It's definitely got a lot of soulful melody as well which makes it very pop and relevant too. I quite like "Full Service" which is their collaboration with New Edition. I probably like it more than Lady Gaga's album actually which says something. I think people will be saying "I can't believe that's the New Kids?!" when they hear it.

I am fully aware that the whole world thinks the Ladyhawke album is amazing. I haven't heard it yet. I know bad EQ, bad EQ. It's like everything I listen to though, the more people tell me I HAVE to listen to something, the more it goes on the backburner because I have to discover it myself before I can get obsessed with it. I'll make an effort to do my homework this week on it though - promise.

And finally, poor Robyn doesn't exactly have a personal relationship with Madonna yet but still feels honored to be supporting her on the Sticky & Sweet Tour. Check out some lo-fi clips here and here of Robyn gracing that Sticky & Sweet stage. Wish Robyn would play the 11th September show in London as well.

Rob Diament adds a bit of his own vibrato and a whole lotta drama to Katy Perry's ubiquitous "I Kissed A Girl" that he performed with Temposhark at a London radio station last night. Very well done. It definitely creates a nice little spin when a guy sings this song and hopes "his boyfriend don't mind it."

On a related note, after releasing their fantastic debut "The Invisible Line" earlier this year, Temoshark is currently writing new material for their sophomore effort.

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